Building Resilience in Children
Resilience- the ability to bounce back from challenges- isn’t something children simply have or don’t have. Rather, it develops over time through many small interactions, supports, and life experiences. Developmental research frames resilience as a dynamic process emerging from collaboration among a child’s internal strengths and the environments around them (family, school, community).
The Second Step article “Why Resilience is Essential for Kids” adds more perspective: resilience is rooted in emotion management, healthy relationships, and responsible decision-making. According to Second Step, children who can name their feelings, pause, breathe, and respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively are better able to “ride the waves” of everyday setbacks. Strong relationships (feeling supported by adults and peers) and the capacity to make thoughtful choices also deepen resilience over time.
In practice, this means promoting resilience isn’t about forcing children to be “strong”. It’s about:
Helping them name and manage emotions with tools like breath work, feelings charts, or short breaks for reflections.
Modeling and supporting positive relationships that encourage connection, empathy, and turning to trusted adults when times get tough.
Encouraging decision-making and problem-solving, even in small tasks, so children develop confidence that their choices matter.
Providing opportunities for manageable challenges, where supports are in place but the child has room to try, fail, and try again.
When children grow up in environments rich in caring relationships, consistent structure, and opportunities to practice self-regulation, resilience becomes a natural outcome. Over time, these habits support children navigate transitions, peer conflicts, academic stress, and the many small challenges of daily life with confidence and adaptability.
Here are a couple articles that provide more information: